A Date With You?
by xthefirestillburns
Summary: A few Superstars and Divas are forced to go out on a date with eachother. Characters: The Undertaker, Edge, Beth Phoenix, Vickie Guerrero, etc.
1. Chapter 1

**This story has been on my mind lately and I just had to write it. This is my first humor story so go easy on me, guys.**

'' Ladies and gentleman welcome to WWE's first annual raffle date!" Stephanie McMahon proudly announced to the WWE Superstars and Divas. '' J. R., will you explain the rules?'' Stephanie asked the legendary commentator.

'' Why yes I can, Stephanie.'' J.R. said. '' Me and Stephanie will draw 6 WWE Superstars and Divas names from my hat. Which ever 6 Superstars and Divas we pick will be able to go on a date with eachother tonight. Stephanie, will you be the one to draw from the hat?'' J.R. asked the brunette.

'' Sure.'' She said. '' Can I get a drumroll?'' The Billion Dollar Princess asked.

A drumroll was played.

'' Our first Superstar is...The Undertaker!'' She announced.

'' Yeah!'' The other wrestlers said as they cheered for the Deadman.

'' And our first Diva will be...Vickie Guerrero!'' J.R. said with a smile.

'' WHY?!'' The Undertaker said in horror as he clenched his fists with his eyes closed.

'' Oh my gosh!'' Vickie said happily as she clapped her hands.

The Divas all patted her shoulder and clapping for her as the Superstars looked at Vickie in disgust.

'' WHY?!'' Taker said again.

'' Mark, you'll be fine. At least you know you won't waste your money on food.'' Triple H whispered looking at the fleshy woman.

'' She's thick.'' The Rated R Superstar, Edge said.

Taker and HHH just looked at their friend.

'' What? I was just joking.'' He said.

'' I think I'm gonna be sick.'' The Deadman said.

'' Our next Superstar we will draw from the hat is... The Big Show!'' JR said.

'' Boo! The wrestlers went.

'' Hey!'' The seven foot said standing to his feet.

Stephanie went inside JR's hat and announced the next Diva.

'' And our next Diva will be...Kelly Kelly.''

Kelly looked at The Big Show in horror.

'' He's going to eat me.'' She said to her friends Mickie James and Melina.

'' Instead of eating you, he may just teach you how to wrestle.'' Melina said under her breath.

'' Our final Superstar will be...Cody Rhodes.'' Stephanie McMahon said.

'' Boo!'' The crowd went.

'' What a string bean!'' Chris Jericho hollered from the crowd.

'' Shut up fatso!'' Cody said angrily.

'' You're just mad because I have blonde hair and a beautiful face. You on the other hand looks like someone beat you with an ugly stick, Lispy Rhodes.'' Jericho said.

'' I can't help that I have a lisp!'' Cody said angrily.

'' And I also can't help that someone beat you with an ugly stick! Haha! '' Jericho said taunting the younger Superstar.

'' Guys, calm down.'' Michael Hickenbottom said. '' Let them call out the last Diva.''

'' Okay. I won't say anything else about Lispy...I mean Cody.'' Jericho corrected himself with a smile.

'' Bastard.'' Cody mumbled.

'' Our last Diva we will announce is...Beth Phoenix!'' Stephanie said.

All of the wrestlers gasped as they looked at The Glamazon.

'' What the hell are you looking at?'' She said to Kelly Kelly.

'' No..Nothing.'' She stammered.

Cody gulped. '' What did I get myself into?'' He asked himself.

**Should I continue? Review Please!**


	2. Chapter 2

'' I can't believe I'm even doing this crap.'' Mark muttered as him and Vickie rode on his Harley-Davidson motorcycle.

'' Tonight's such a beautiful night.'' Vickie said as she held the Deadman even tighter.

'' Damnit, girl!'' He muttered.

'' What did you say, Mark?'' She asked.

'' Nothing. It's just that the night is beautiful...just like you.'' He said with a fake smile.

'' Aw. Thank you, Mark. You're not like most guys, you know that?'' Vickie said smiling.

'' No...I didn't.'' Mark said with his same fake smile.

Vickie let out a happy and laid her head on Mark's back.

Mark just rolled his eyes and continued driving to the restaurant.

_The night's going to be over soon. Just hang in there, Mark. _He thought.

Vickie and mark finally arrived at the restaurant.

Vickie gasped. '' I love this place!'' She exclaimed.

_I bet you do. _Mark thought. _Stop that! _He thought again.

'' You do?'' He said smiling.

'' Yeah I do. I love coming here for lunch when we're here in New York City.'' She said.

_She's not that bad when she's not saing excuse me. _Taker thought.

'' Come on. Let's go inside.'' Taker said getting off the motorcylce.

He took Vickie's hand to help her off the Harley and the two went inside.

* * *

'' Now when we go in this restaurant I want you to eat a real meal. None of that anorexic, diet crap, you and the rest of those non-talented girls eat.'' The Big Show said as he and Kelly were on their way to a restaurant also.

Kelly just looked at Show.

'' I mean... the rest of those beautiful Divas just like you.'' He said with an awkward smile.

'' Are you saying we can't wrestle?'' Kelly asked.

'' No. I would never say that you ladies couldn't do a simple Clothesline or DDT because I know you can.'' He said uncomfortably.

'' Oh. I thought that's what you were saying. Me and the ladies have improved so much since we've been in the WWE.'' She said.

'' You have?!'' He said. '' I mean...you sure have.'' He said with a chuckle. '' Just shut up, Paul.'' He said under his breath.

'' What was that?'' The blonde said.

'' Nothing.''

* * *

'' Cody hurry your ass up now!'' Beth sneered.

'' I'm coming. I have to lock the doors so no one tries to break into it.'' He said frightenly.

'' I don't care what you have to do. When you're on a date with me I am the number one priority.'' She said angrily.

'' But-

'' What did you say?'' She said coming towards him.

'' Nothing.'' He said putting his hands up to protect himself.

Beth chuckled.'' I knew you were a little punk. What is everyone going to say when they see me with a little scrawny little stick like yourself?'' She said smiling.

'' I am not a stick.'' He said finally defending himself.

'' I said you are a stick. Now come on and take me into this restaurant.'' She said grabbing him by his skinny arm.

'' Ouch!'' Cody said in pain.

'' Shut up!'' The Glamazon said and pulled him to the restaurant.

Okay I know it was not that great, but please review.

Oh and thanks for the reviews **Golden-Black Dragon, DeeDaanger, Caity. Chaos, Trishrocks, jeffhardyismyhero, and Mamacyta Luvs RKO. **You guys rock!


	3. Chapter 3

Vickie and Mark walked into the restaurant.

Vickie smiled and let out a happy sigh.

'' What's wrong?'' Mark asked in a concerned way as he looked at the woman.

''Nothing..it's just...I love the atmosphere of this restaurant at night.'' She said.

'' Oh. I thought there was a problem.'' Taker said with a small smile.

'' Not at all.'' Vickie said smiling back.

The two tooks their seats and waited for the waiter to come to their table. He finally came over a few seconds later.

''Hello you two. How may I serve you?'' He asked.

Mark looked into his menu.

''Uh...I'll have a steak and potatoes and a beer.'' He simply said.

'' Ma'am?'' The waiter asked.

'' Hold on this is going to take a while.'' Vickie said. '' I would like the steak and potatoes, the nachoes, the hot wings, the strawberry cheesecake, and a small diet coke. I'm trying to watch my figure.'' She said smiling.

Taker gave Vickie a look.

_Who the hell are you trying to fool? _Mark thought.

'' Will that be all?'' The waiter asked.

'' Just for now.'' Vickie replied.

'' Okay. Your orders will be back shortly.'' He said and took their menus.

'' You sure have a big appetite.'' Mark chuckled.

'' I can't help it. I've been craving food like this for months now.'' She said.

'' Me too. I haven't had a decent meal in weeks.''

'' Me either.''

_When do you ever? _Mark thought again.

Mark and Vickie waited for the waiter. While they were waiting Mark happened to see a few familiar faces walking into the restaurant.

_Damnit!_ Mark thought. _What the hell are they doing here?_

'' Hey, Mark. Vickie.'' Paul said coming towards their table along with Stephanie, Trish, Adam, Chris, and Amy.

''...Hi.'' He said.

He sure wasn't in the mood for their bull today, especially Paul's.

''Hey, guys.'' Vickie said.

'' How's your date going?'' Stephanie asked.

'' It's going great. Mark let me ride on the back of his Harley.'' Vickie replied with a big smile.

'' You did?'' Chris said with a smile.

'' Yeah. I did.'' Taker said.

'' Has anyone ever told you, you two make a great couple?'' Amy asked.

'' They sure do. Isn't that right, babe?'' Trish asked Adam.

'' Yep.'' He said with his arms around Trish's waist.

If Vickie had not been there Mark would've shut all of them up before they even had a chance to laugh. He never did because he didn't want Vickie to see that side of him.

* * *

Big Show parked his truck and opened his door to get Kelly's door.

''Thank you.'' She said smiling.

'' Your welcome.'' He said.

The two walked into the restaurant and Show automatically hit his head trying to come through the door.

'' Ouch!'' He said. '' Damn door.''

Kelly just giggled.

'' Not funny.'' Show said holding his head.

The two took a seat.

'' Maybe we shouldn't have picked this restaurant.'' Kelly said looking at Show's feet go way pass the table.

'' It's ok. We're fine.'' Show said.

'' You sure?'' Kelly said.

'' Yeah. Why wouldn't I be? Did I tell you that you look beautiful tonight?''

'' No you didn't.'' Kelly said with a smile.

'' Well you do.'' Show said smiling back.

'' Thank you, Show.'' Kelly said.

'' Your welcome.'' he said putting his large hand over her's.

Kelly laughed uncomfortably as she tried to slip her hand from under Show's. It was no use.

* * *

Beth and Cody was in the restaurant eating their dinner.

'' Now when we leave I expect you to pay my way. You hear me?''

'' Why? It's not like we're on a real date.'' Cody said.

'' What did you say?!'' Beth said as she pulled Cody to her face.

Cody gulped. '' Nothing. I'll pay your way. Um...waiter!'' Cody said.

The waiter came over.

'' How may I help you, sir?''

'' Sir? Yeah right.'' Beth said to herself.

'' Can I get the bill.'' He said.

'' Sure. I'll be right back.'' He said.

The waiter came back a couple minutes later with their bill.

'' What the-

Beth just looked at Cody.

''It's fine.'' he said.

'' You're such a wimp.'' She said. '' Hurry up and pay the bill so we can go. You're making me mad.'' She said.

Cody just sighed and gave the waiter the money.

'' Thank you so much.'' He said.

'' Your welcome.'' Cody said.

'' Come on, Punk!'' Beth said and grabbed his arm once again to leave the restaurant.

Poor Taker, Kelly, and Cody. What are they going to be put through next? Keep reading and you'll find out.

Review please!


	4. Chapter 4

Paul and the others finally went to their seats after a few minutes of ranting on and on about Mark and Vickie. Mark had a few things to do after this date was over. The first thing he was going to do was kick Paul's butt for running his mouth so much.

Mark just sat at the table quiet looking out the window.

'' Is something wrong, Mark?'' Vickie asked.

Mark looked away from the window and turned to Vickie.

'' No. Not at all.'' He said with a fake smile.

There he was again with the fake smile.

The waiter finally came over a few seconds later. He had to have another waiter help him bring all the food to the table at once.

'' Thank you so much, gentleman.'' Vickie said smiling at the two waiters.

'' Your welcome, miss.''

'' Thanks.'' Mark said.

'' No problem, sir.'' They said and went into the back.

As soon as Vickie pulled out her silverware she began to attack her steak. Mark's jaw dropped as he looked at the woman eating like she had never eaten before.

_Damn! _Mark thought. '' You're really hungry, aren't you?'' He asked with a smile.

Vickie looked up and wiped her mouth. '' Yeah I am. Sorry if I'm eating loud.'' She said.

'' No. It's ok.'' Mark said.

Vickie just smiled, which made Mark cringe a little.

_Just eat your food, Mark._ He thought.

An Hour Later

Vickie sighed. '' Gosh, that food was good.'' She said. '' How was your food, Mark?'' She asked.

''Uhh..it was good. My steak could've been cooked longer, but other than that it was good.'' He replied.

'' That's good to know.'' Vickie said smiling.

The waiter came back to the table.

'' Here's your bill.'' He said handing the receipt to Mark.

'' Thank you.'' Mark said and looked at the bill. '' 200 damn dollars!'' Oh!'' He said and fainted in his seat.

* * *

Kelly and Show were driving to the park.

'' I hope you like Jazz because there's a Jazz concert at the park. I hope you enjoy it.'' Show said with a smile.

'' Oh I like Jazz. Lady Gaga is the best Jazz muisician ever!'' She said confidently.

Shows smiled immidietaly went to a frown. '' That's not Jazz.'' He said looking at her.

'' Yes it is. Me and the Divas listen to her all the time.'' Kelly said trying to correct Show.

'' Whatever, Kelly.'' He said shaking head.

It was no use trying to correct such a dumb blonde like Kelly, so Show just left it alone.

Show and Kelly got to the park. Show opened the door for Kelly and the two walked over to the concert.

'' Now this is what I call Jazz!'' Show said looking at the musicians play.

'' This isn't Jazz. Where's Lady Gaga? I just to hear Just Dance and Pokerface.'' She said smiling.

'' How many times am I going to tell you, Lady Gaga is not Jazz!'' Show said.

* * *

''Hey how about we go to a bar?'' Beth asked.

'' A bar? For what? That's not a date.''

'' What did you just say?''

'' Bar it is.'' Cody said with a smile.

Beth just looked at him with a serious look on her face.

Cody's smile immidietaly dissapeared. '' Bar it is.'' He said and drove to the bar.

Beth and Cody finally got to the bar. They walked inside and took a seat at a table.

'' Go get me a a Budweiser. '' Beth said.

'' A Budweiser? Heinekin is the best, hon?'' Cody said with a smile.

'' What did you just call me?'' She asked with a serious look on her face.

'' Nothing. I'll be right back.'' He said and stood to his feet.

'' Good.''

Cody started to the bar.

'' And don't get me a cheap beer either! I know the difference from that and a Budweiser!'' Beth hollered across the bar at Cody.

Beth heard a few whistles.

'' What did you just say?'' She asked the men of the bar.

No one said anything.

'' I thought so!'' She said and crossed her arms together with a mean look on her face. '' Hurry up!'' She said to Cody.

Review Please!

Thanks for the reviews everyone. You guys rock!


	5. Chapter 5

**So I'm finally back. This will be the last chapter in the story. Thanks so much for reviewing guys!**

Vickie and Mark were driving back to the hotel.

'' Mark, you don't know how terrified I was. I thought that were never going to wake up.'' Vickie said.

'' Thanks, Vickie, but I'm fine. No need to worry.'' Mark reassured her.

'' Are you sure?'' She asked.

'' Yes, Vickie.'' Mark said.

''Okay.'' She said slowly.

Mark and Vickie continued back to the hotel when out of nowhere Mark heard his front tire pop.

'' What the hell?'' He said.

'' What's going on?'' Vickie asked.

Mark drove to the side of the street and parked his motorcycle. He hopped off and looked at the front tire.

'' Damn!'' Mark said in anger.

'' Is it a flat tire?'' Vickie asked.

'' Yeah.'' Mark said frustrated. _Could this night get any worse?_ He thought to himself.

'' Don't worry, Mark. We can call a tow truck.'' Vickie said pulling out her cell phone.

A few seconds later she discovered her phone was dead.

'' Do you have your phone with you?'' She asked.

'' No. I left it at the hotel. I sure wish I brought it.'' Mark said and sighed. He then walked over to the side walk and sat down.

'' All I wanted was to enjoy a nice night out on the town and the total opposite has happened.'' Mark said.

'' Oh come on, Mark, don't say that. We had a great night despite the fact that you fainted and your motorcycle's on a flat.'' Vickie said.

'' Thanks, Vickie. I feel so much better.'' Mark said sarcasticly.

'' I was just trying to make you feel better.'' Vickie said sensing the sarcasm.

'' Well you're not. You never did. This night has been hell for me and you wanna know why?''

'' Why?''

'' Because of you!'' Mark shouted as he pointed at Vickie.

'' Well...I didn't know that.'' Vickie said teary eyed.

'' Vickie, I-

'' Its ok, Mark.'' Vickie said quietly with her head hanging down.

'' I didn't mean what I said, I was frustrated that's all. I'm sorry.''

Vickie looked up and sniffled. '' You mean it?''

'' Yeah. I do.'' Mark said coming towards her.

Vickie looked in Mark's green eyes as a smile formed. Mark just looked at her with a nervous and uncomfortable smile.

_I hope she's not about to do what I think she's about to do. _Mark thought. _Oh shit! She is! _He thought again.

Vickie slowly moved her face towards Mark's and slowly kissed Mark's lips. She then pulled away. Mark just looked at Vickie in shock as his mouth was wide open.

''Damnit, girl!'' He said out loud with fists clenched and his eyes closed. '' Uh.'' He said dizzily and fainted onto the ground.

'' Mark? Mark!'' Vickie said shaking him.

* * *

Kelly and Show were drving back to the hotel.

'' I had such a great time with you, Show.'' Kelly said.

'' Me too, Kelly. Even though you're nothing but a dumb blonde. Oops did I just say that?'' Show said.

'' Yeah ya did and I am not a dumb blonde. I know what music genre Lady Gaga is.''

'' Kelly, how many times are we going to go through this. Lady Gaga is not jazz!''

'' Yes she is. I'm surprised she wasn't on stage. Papa-papa-razzi!'' She said singing the lyrics to Lady Gaga's "Paparazzi".

Show just shook his head and continued driving.

The Hotel

Kelly and Show finally arrived back at the hotel. They went inside and said their goodbyes in the lobby.

''Well I guess this is goodbye.'' Kelly said with her normal smile.

''Yeah.'' Show said.

Kelly stood on her tippy-toes to try to kiss Show. There was no use since he was 7ft and she was only 5'5. Show figured out what she was trying to do and bent over so she could kiss cheek.

'' See you later, Kelly.'' He said with a smile and went upstairs to his room.

Show stepped out of the elevator and walked to his room. He pulled out his key, opened the door, and walked inside. He threw his bags onto the floor and collapsed onto the bed. A few minutes into his sleep he was awaken by the door.

''Yeah? Who's there?'' He asked still in the bed.

''Its me, Kelly.''

'' What do you want now?'' He said as he got out of bed and went to the door.

Show opened the door.

'' What can I do for you, Kelly?''

'' I left my key in my room and my roomate has the other key. I don't know where she is, can I room with you for the night?''

Show sighed. '' Fine.''

'' Great!'' She exclaimed and walked inside.

Show just rolled his eyes and closed the door.

'' Thanks for letting me sleep here, Show. You don't know how grateful I am.'' Kelly said throwing her bag onto the spare bed.

'' Oh I know, Kelly.'' Show said annoyed.

Kelly just smiled and went inside the bathroom to change into her pajamas. When she came out Show was already in bed sleep. Kelly dug inside her bag and got her i-Pod out. She crawled inside of bed, put on her ear phones, and turned on the music.

'' Papa-papa-razzi!'' She sung out loud.

'' Oh no!'' Show said and put his pillow over his head.

* * *

Cody came back to the table with the two beers at hand.

'' What took you so long?'' Beth growled as she snatched her beer from Cody.

'' The bartender didn't believe my ID was real. He thought I was an underage drinker.'' Cody explained.

'' Maybe if you worked out more he wouldn't have thought that.''

'' Hey. I can't help the fact that I'm not ripped. And why do you care anyway?'' Cody asked.

'' You know what I am so tired of you running your little mouth.''

'' And? What are you gonna do about it?''

Out of nowhere Beth grabbed Cody's arm and began to painfully twist it as she pulled him to her face.

'' You say one more thing out of line and I promise you will regret it. Got it?''

Cody gulped. '' Got it.'' He said.

''Good.'' Beth said and forcefully pushed him away.

Cody shot back in his seat as he let out a whimper.

'' It really is fun pushing you around, you know that?'' Beth said with a smile on her face. '' Now come on and dance with me.''

Cody groaned.

'' Did I just hear a groan?''

'' No.''

'' I didn't think so.'' Beth said and put her hand out for Cody to grab.

'' What?''

Beth became angry and pulled him over by the jukebox. The two began to dance. As the two danced Beth put her head on Cody's shoulder as Cody strained to stay on his feet. Beth was not a light woman.

'' Come on let's get out of here.'' Beth said.

'' Where are we going?'' Cody asked.

'' Back to the hotel.''

'' To do what?''

'' You'll see.'' Beth said and pulled Cody along with her.

The Hotel

Beth and Cody got to Beth's room.

'' So why did you want me to come here?'' Cody asked.

'' Aaah!'' Beth screamed and threw Cody against the wall.

Cody screamed like a little girl as Beth began kissing his lips.

'' Aah!'' She said again and threw Cody on the bed. She kissed him once again and began ripping off his clothes.

'' Daddy!'' Cody screamed to the top of his lungs.

The End.

**Please review for this final time.**


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